Now imagine you identified a conflict and you found out the need hidden needs behind the conflict and you also know what the fear is and the desire.
You have yourself figured out and you feel you can take care of yourself, feel better and approach things differently, more to your liking.
How powerful does that feel?
You stay now strong in your own shoes and can communicate differently.
What you say is not charged with expectations because you know what you need and how to satisfy your need, you see option and you feel your personal power that you can use to this end.
Now you go back to face the conflict and you can be open and honest over what happened inside of you and how that impacted the communication.
As you communicate without an emotional expectation from the other, you will notice that it has a different effect on the other altogether.
You and your counterpart are now both in the present with what your conflict really is about and with clarity about what needs to happen to resolve it.
It is much easier to stay in the here and now when you can communicate this way, but surely it requires some prep work.
Would you like to read more about conflicts and how to solve them? Download the checklist 'Conflict to Avoid'