All of us confronted directly or indirectly with an affair have asked themselves this question and realized there is not a straightforward answer.
However there are some important reflection that I would like to share to look at your relationship in a way that I believe is going to make cheating less likely.
The first very important suggestion I would give you is to talk about what you consider cheating with your partner. Be aware that there are often big differences between what you and your partner consider cheating. Be honest about what you would consider cheating if you partner did it and check if the same standard would also apply if you were having that same behavior.
The second suggestion is to talk regularly and openly about where do you feel your relationship is at. Reality versus desired reality, is there a gap? What is the reason there is a gap? Do you share the same vision about what the relationship would ideally be like? Do you know the desires of your partner? Does your partner knows yours? If not, why not?
The third and last suggestion is to focus your attention on making your partner feel special. Do that in all the ways that you see possible and as often as you manage.
If your reaction to this idea is one of the following:
- You don't want to do it because the other doesn't do it for you;
- You don't feel it, it would be fake;
- You don't think your partner is special.
Than it may be time to have an honest conversation about your relationship with your partner (see second suggestion).
For more inspiration on this theme I add a video of Ester Perel on this topic.