Photo by Ganapathy Kumar on Unsplash
Where it comes to goal setting you more easily picture a business environment, a masculine environment characterized by sharpness, efficiency and effectiveness. If we had to put a female filter to all this we would have:
Goal setting becomes expressing desires
A business environment would become the kitchen of an herbalist or the practice space of an healer,
Sharpness would be replaced by intuition,
Efficiency would become attention
And effectiveness would turn into wholeheartedness.
What would actually be different?
And do we have to choose for one of the two styles or can we combine them?
The best answer start with a practical examples, or maybe two.
A man want to find a romantic partner, that is his goal, and he sets to do that in a masculine style, his favorite style. He has clear what he wants his partner to have as characteristic (age, area where she lives, interests they may have in common and things of the sort). He knows that he can invest one evening a week for the search and after he has found her he wants a LAT relationship (LAT stands for Living Apart Together). He wants to achieve his result in the coming six months.
When he goes on his first date, he meets a woman, she is also looking for a romantic partner, however she is doing it using a more feminine style. She feels a strong desires to share her life with a partner and she knows how she wants to feel when she is with him: she wants to feel safe, relaxed, she desires intimacy and adventure. Instead of age, location and interest, she is more focused on his soul, his personality and his openness to adventure.
How would you think the date between these two will go?
Difficult to say, sometimes attraction takes over, others times works the saying ‘opposites attracts’ and some other times differences just brings misunderstanding and disappointment.
What is interesting to see in these examples is how differently you can look at the same thing, in this case wanting a romantic partner.
You can maybe reflect on what is your favorite style between the masculine and the feminine, as I have them shortly described.
In which style do you feel more comfortable?
Do you know where this preference originates?
Would you like to try also the other style sometimes?
The suggestion that I am making with this blog is that both style have a lot of value, and actually that the best choice is a combination of the two. Can you imagine the richness, the diversity and the intensity of being able to combine these two styles to the formulation of a goal and to the making of the plan to realize it?
Let’s say I want to earn more money that I currently do.
I can approach it as a SMART goal, being specific about how much I want to earn, make sure that I am aiming at something that is achievable in my current situation, that I have a plan on how to achieve that result step by step and that I have a plan for how long it is going to take to get there.
But I can add to all this that I want to create value in the world and thanks to that added value that I create I want to enjoy abundance so that I can create even more value for even more people. And I will focus on what are my talents, my desires and how I can combine them to create a product of value that gives me joy to share with other. How attuned to myself in all these steps will be really important. If I am aligned I have all my energy or inner power available and that is going to feel like work actively and without effort towards my desires.
You see how goals become desires when they feel good and feel aligned with your essence?
All you have to do is to look for the desire behind every goal, for the healing you want to bring to the world behind every enterprise you start, for what need attention to blossom and what the role of your heart is in it.
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