Reaching a deeper level of intimacy is a desire many partners have. Even couple that consider themselves happy, often desire to reach a deeper level of intimate connection.
Learn how to be present can be a great way to move in that direction. When I use the term 'presence' I mean the open attitude, heart connected to heart stand, where both partners show up with their truth and hold space for each other's truth.
The first of these blog about intelligence summarizes the talk of Prof. dr. Kathleen Venderikxs about what goes often wrong for people with above average intelligence on the work floor.
The first important point she makes is that there is a difference between what is commonly believed to be the profile of an above average person and what gifted people actually are.
Increasingly often I find myself talking for the first time with a client and realize from what I hear that he/she probably has an intelligence above average.
The I ask few question to make sure and with that extra confirmation I approach the topic with the client. I do this carefully, knowing out of experience that the first reaction is more often than not :'I don't really think so.'
The long term goal when you discover that you have ADD is to develop into a well functioning satisfied person that can live with the aspects that ADD brings with it.
The video that I attach below is focused on adolescent with ADD, this text is focused on translating that information for adult that recognize in themselves ADD characteristics.
We are all seeds that became trees in time and we keep growing in more majestic, wise and powerful trees every day. We cannot stop is and we probably wouldn't if we could.
Life shapes our branches with all experiences that cross our path and all the reaction that we choose to have.
When you share your life path with a partner, your tree start to grow branches intertwined with the branches of your loved one and if you have children the seeds that your children come from will grow not far from you and supported by your presence.
How to promote development of people with ADD?
The key is in how the environment and the people in it relate to people with ADD:
- The emotional support we give them;
- The calmness we give them (read here the awareness of possible stress and adequate ways to handle it);
- The acceptance we give them (it can be difficult and it implies that the acceptance is mutual).
Action has meaning only in a relationship, and without understanding relationship, action on any level will only breed conflict.
The understanding of relationships is infinitely more important than the search for any plan of action.
It is often said that it takes a village to raise a child and it is indeed so. There are many people contributing to the environment where a child grows in. Of course the influence of the main caregivers is prevalent.
'Children swim in their parent's unconscious as fishes in the sea'.
On a biological level ADD has to do with low dopamine level.
Dopamine is a neurotransmitter involved in:
Focus - Attention - Motivation
The main objective of medication for ADD is to elevate dopamine.
ADD, Attention Deficit Disorder, has three main characteristics:
1) POOR ATTENTION
If people with ADD are not really interested they struggle to pay attention over a period of time. This implies distractibility: the attention wonder far too easily and therefore tasks can take longer to get completed or not get completed at all. An aspect of this is forgetfulness: leave things behind, forgetting what you were actually doing etc.;
I have written so much about the inner critic, maybe too much. I like when I find other people explaining it better than I do. In this specific video there is also a beautiful and simple way you can challenge your inner critic.
Write a letter to your teacher/boss/self dated one year from now, where you explain how you achieved this extraordinary goal that you are now starting to work at. Extra instruction is to fall desperately in love with the person you are describing in the letter.